Rules of online social engagement I wish I knew in 1999

  1. If you come off as desperate for approval, no one will give you any.
  2. People think of their time, attention, and emotional engagement as finite and valuable. They will not lend much of it to you unless they know and trust you.
  3. Emailing and DMing strangers without solicitation is treated as an attempt to take their attention by force. If you do it, most people will treat you the way they’d treat someone who tried to steal their wallet.
  4. People feel more comfortable with a situation if…